“The Climb” S03E06 Game of Thrones Review
Warning: I’ve probably spoilt a lot in this review.
Just when you think a show can’t surprise you anymore (like when you stupidly read the books beforehand – see last weeks review http://revued.net/index.php/kissed-by-fire-s03e05-game-of-thrones-review/), it jumps up and slaps you in the face. Joy, oh joy! Melisandre, then Gendry (no, not Gendry), followed by that meeting of minds, or rather balls, between Olenna and Tywin and to top it all off, the unholiest of betrayals, Ros. I was relying on her for interest seeing as she is a character entirely created for the series. You bastards, though I will start to feel a little less inferior now I won’t be seeing her lovely nakedness bouncing around my TV screen.
With book 3 A Storm of Swords being a bit of a slog, the writers have been clever enough to litter the series with a few extra scenes here and there, utilizing the plethora of characters that are sadly underused in the novels due to the structure of the writing. They have also be wise to bring forward some characters stories that if they followed the books to the letter, wouldn’t be seen for a few more series at least (I’m guessing – I’ve read up to the end of series 4/books 1 -3 and you do not hear from Theon at all).
Speaking of Theon, who is that delightful psychopath torturing him? Known simply as ‘Boy’, he is played by Iwan Rheon, who you may recognise from Misfits, a few episodes of ‘Grandma’s House (I’m certain there will be a Retrovued on that show now that I remember it), and unfortunately that pile of decaying tripe, Vicious, currently on ITV1. I love him. I want to keep him in a pit and throw roadkill and people who have wronged me at him. I also want him to continue tearing pieces off Theon, as much as I’m fond of him as well. He even had some kind of horn: the whole scene was majestic, disturbing, funny and gory. Everything you want in a show like this, and we’ve been sadly lacking since characters like Joffrey, the Hound and Viserys appeared to have been neutered or killed. Though that was before the ending, where it seems Joffrey has been quietly turning it up a notch.
The stand out performance for me, after ‘Boy’ of course, is Paul Kaye as Thoros of Myr. Those of you not old enough won’t remember, but that guy used to be on The Sunday Show as fricking Dennis Pennis. As in saying to Steve Martin on a red carpet ‘How come you’re not funny anymore?’ Dennis Pennis. I once saw him in an episode of Spaced jumping around a stage with a hoover attached to his head. His character was called Hoover. This guy can act. I’m also loving the casual way in which he brings his dead pal back to life. The arrival of Melisandre not only brought trouble for Gendry (another thing I haven’t read about yet so I’m keeping my fingers crossed it’s not going to end for him the way I think it is), but also more talk about R’hllor, the lord of light. It’s starting to look like he is actually pretty powerful, as Thoros put it ‘I didn’t believe in our Lord [. . .] then I knew the truth. Our God is the one true God.’ Which unfortunately means that everyone I’m rooting for is screwed, because they are all on the wrong side. And probably more screen time for Stannis, though I’m hoping the Red Woman has been taking him for a ride, as I doubt he’s the second coming of Azor Ahai. If he is, he’s a fucking miserable version.
As well as lunatics, we had a small helping of some action this week, with the wildlings finally going over the Wall, after talking about it for about 4 episodes. The Wall itself looked stunning and was well worth the wait, though I wasn’t a fan of the Hollywood style jeopardy, I’m not sure why, I think I just didn’t believe anyone was going to end up as a splat on the ground. To be fair, there’s not much you can do to liven up a wall climb, even if it’s 700 feet, as Samwell skillfully informed us at the beginning of the episode.
One thing that is annoying me about this series is the little cameos that go nowhere. Did we really just have that scene so Samwell could remind us how tall the Wall is and that he has dragonglass on him? Could they not have done that in other ways so we didn’t get our hopes up that we’re going to have a Samwell episode? Or Brienne in a dress. They could at least have had her standing up for a few moments, so we could see the whole thing. Why tease us! Stop showing me characters that I’m never going to see again! Collect all these little moments up and have them in the same episode. I don’t need you to have a 2 minute scene to tell me where someone is. Wait until you have 20 minutes, then tell me. You are happy to do this with Daenerys, who’s lucky if she even appears in an episode, but you insist on showing me a very beautifully done scene with Tyrion, Sansa and Shae and then bugger off so I miss all the good stuff. What about Loras and Sansa, did we need a scene showing us their awkwardness, we know he’s a ‘sword swallower through and through’. And Osha and Meera fighting, Jojen’s vision: just so you know, we were well aware that Jon was the wrong side of the Wall and surrounded by enemies, I don’t need to know that Bran now knows it! I know I love the scene between Olenna and Tywin, and some might find that unnecessary, but just stop padding it out with little snippets which aren’t vital or have zero entertainment value and give the other scenes some meat. Please.
The closing scene between Littlefinger and Varys was fun just to see the pair together again, as I don’t think we’ll be seeing much of that from now on. We rarely see so much fizzling tension between two people, and seeing as both of them seem to be fairly celibate, that’s quite an achievement. It was all leading to the shock ending, though there’s one thing I have to point out: did anyone have ‘I’m Batman’ circling through their minds as the credits rolled? Give that man a lozenge. Though I’ve had a bit of a rant about the show spreading it’s characters too thin, I thoroughly enjoyed this episode. It had just the right mix of humour, shocks and plot development that we require. Just sharpen it up a bit HBO.
8/10
